Need a haircut? Here, take twoYou never quite plan to give yourself a haircut. Everyone knows that would be pretty silly. The dexterity required to manipulate a scissors and cut neatly and evenly in the 360 degree circle surrounding your head is beyond human capabilities.
By: Jill Pertler, Pine Journal
You never quite plan to give yourself a haircut. Everyone knows that would be pretty silly. The dexterity required to manipulate a scissors and cut neatly and evenly in the 360 degree circle surrounding your head is beyond human capabilities.
You never quite plan to give yourself a haircut, but there could be a time when you look in the mirror and see that a few strands have grown just a little longer than the others.
Or, maybe your bangs have gotten out of control and need a little trim. I’ve cut my bangs on a couple (OK, several) occasions. Once, when on vacation, I didn’t have a scissors so I used a kitchen shears. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I am lucky because I have a hair stylist who understands my maverick tendencies. At least she is willing to put up with them. I’ve made numerous confessions while sitting in her chair; we have a candid and honest relationship. She even knows about the kitchen shears incident.
But that’s pale in comparison to my experience yesterday.
Yesterday, I got a haircut. Actually, I got two.
I got my first haircut right after lunch. I had an appointment. My hair got layered and snipped, trimmed and blow-dried by a professionally trained stylist.
Afterward, I went home and did what most of us do immediately following a haircut. I turned on my curling irons and went to work brushing, fluffing and hair spraying. I got things looking pretty good, but there was one tuft of hair that just wouldn’t stay in its place. It curled up just enough to be irritating, and no amount of gel, spray or coaxing would make it behave. So, I contemplated the unthinkable and made a blunderous decision; I reached for my scissors and prepared to make the tiniest of snips.
You know how it is with scissors. One thing led to another. I snipped the errant tuft, and a second one appeared on the other side of my head. A quick snip over there and now my sides were uneven. I corrected that, and soon noticed that the back of my head was substantially longer than the front.
Have you ever tried to cut the hair at the back of your head? To say it’s not easy is an understatement. Picture yourself standing with your back to the bathroom mirror, holding a second mirror in one hand, a scissors in the other, trying to compensate for everything in the mirrors being backwards. You have to move right when you want to cut left.
Much like a home improvement project, my little hair snipping fiasco took on a life of its own. I was just trying to get everything even, but kept correcting and overcompensating because of the whole mirror reversal phenomenon. Before I knew, it I had a whole new hairstyle.
The miraculous thing is, it doesn’t look all that bad. It’s nowhere near the debacle of 1989 when I decided my husband should give me a perm. Now there was a questionable decision.
Despite being presentable, I still have a dilemma. What if I run into my hair stylist at the grocery store? I’d have to duck out of sight, because without a doubt she’d recognize me, but not my hair. She’d know some sort of shenanigans was in the works. She might even think I was seeing another stylist behind her back, when the only thing going on behind anyone’s back is me with a mirror trying to cut a straight line.
I like my hair stylist way too much to let her think I’d see someone else – other than myself, backwards in the mirror, that is. If my life’s escapades have taught me one thing it’s this: Sometimes it’s best to ‘fess up.
I’ll have to tell her the truth. I’ll start with something like: You never quite plan to give yourself a haircut. Everyone knows that would be pretty silly.
Jill Pertler is a syndicated columnist and award winning freelance writer working with graphic designer Nikki Willgohs to provide writing and design and other marketing services to businesses and individuals. You can check out their Web site at http://marketing-by-design.home.mchsi.com/ or e-mail Jill at firstname.lastname@example.org.